Change seems like a difficult activity to pursue.
We may find ourselves in moments of discomfort and anxiety when the world we thought we knew seems distant. In these moments of discomfort and anxiety, our inclination is to return to the path we have previously travelled- or to remain in our bubble. This is an issue because we assume discomfort means something is somehow wrong rather than a project of working towards something new, exciting and fulfilling. This is often why we retreat towards old habits and away from new opportunities, or new ways of looking at the world.
Think about your own life and moments of change that have occured.
Do you remember starting a new job? Going to a new school? Moving to a new city? Going on a first date? Everything seems a bit strange and disorientating at first. Over time we adjust, we become comfortable, and we feel at home. When we begin feel at home we forget how disorientating the first moments of change may be and we become excited about the adventure of enduring new experiences.
Change is often incremental and we take small steps forward.
When we move to a new city we explore our block, then our neighbourhood, and before you know it you begin to know the city as well as anything else you have known in your life. As we take these little steps forward and with each step the world in front of us begins to feel a little more like home.
I am inviting you to start taking these small steps.
To take action against gender-based violence each and everyday by walking forward rather than stepping back or travelling on the same old path we have always known. Below is a list of ten simple changes guys can make in our lives to to help us to see the world in a new way. Changes that help us to understand the experiences of others and to learn to see ourselves in a new and exciting ways.
10 things guys can do to address gender-based violence:
- Follow a feminist social media site or blog. (example: feministkilljoys.com)
- Remind people that ‘locker room talk’ and sexist jokes are not funny.
- Learn to understand the difference between flirting and sexual harassment. Remember, people are not playing ‘hard to get’. Likely they are just not interested.
- Listen to someone else perspective on an important topic without offering your own opinion. Learn to be a listener and not take up too much space.
- Talk to your son, brother, friend, dad, or co-worker about gender equality.
- Talk to your son, brother, friend, dad, or co-worker about practicing consent.
- Read books, listen to music, or watch movies made by someone from a different gender, sexual orientation, cultural background, or ability from your own.
- Don’t be afraid to show your feminine side: dance, sing, knit, or buy your guy friend some flowers. Do these activities with or around other men.
- Reject being confined to gender roles. It is okay to cry if you are sad or cry if you are happy.
- Learn to be okay with not knowing. Be excited about becoming a learner.
Recognize that you can make a different if you are willing to do the work.